What to do if you hear a child has been sexually abused.
You need to assure the child that what happened to them is the responsibility of the alleged perpetrator. It is important that you demonstrate by words and actions that you will do everything you can to protect him/her from further abuse.
Children need to hear that their behavior was courageous. The following are some “DOs” and “DON’Ts” to keep in mind after a child has made a disclosure of sexual abuse and during the process of investigation and intervention.
DOs
- Allow the child to use his/her own words to describe the incident
- Assure the child that they are not to blame for what happened
- Treat the child normally
- Take care of the child’s emotional needs
- Listen and take notes
- Allow the child to talk about the incident if they bring it up
- Write down concerns and questions for child protective services personnel, police officers, and therapists
- Love and support the child
DON’Ts
- Use your language to help the child describe what happened
- Try to interview or investigate
- Overreact
- Express fear, anger and anxiety
- Initiate conversation about the incidents
- Let personal feelings influence the child
- Reward the child for giving information
Effects: Recognizing the Damage
What follows here are excerpts fro ma chapter from 'The Courage To Heal' by Laura Davis and Ellen Bass: "The long-term effects of child sexual abuse can be so pervasive that it's sometimes hard to pinpoint exactly how the abuse affected you...many survivors have been too busy surviving to notice the ways they were hurt...
